April 2017

Driving your kids to sleep

Did you know that sleep deprivation is the main cause of martial problems and family stress?

In a recent survey of 1 wife, conducted in my house*. 100% of housewives felt it contributed to stress in the household. (However in the same survey it was also found that the husband used to blurt all their secrets out on the internet and no matter how he came across online was generally a grumpy bollocks in person ( sleep or no sleep)). 

*Survey by Daddy Poppins Surveys Inc.


Police are investigating a local pet shop after second ‘weasel popping incident’ in recent times.

Goldilocks case – Court report

There was uproar today in a special sitting of the Far Far Away Circuit court over the downgraded charge and lenient sentencing of wealthy youth in a breaking and entering case (which has been dubbed the ‘Goldilocks and the Bears’ case by the media).

Rock A Bye Baby – Police issue a warning to new parents

A couple in their twenties were questioned by Police following the placement of a four-month-old baby boy in a tree top in the hope that he would ‘rock to sleep’ have been released without charge. 

Breaking and Entering, suspect at large

Detectives in the Enchanted Forest area of Far Far Away are asking for the public’s help in identifying and apprehending a suspect in a recent breaking-and-entering incident. A short golden haired suspect is still at large.

Easter at Rathwood

We were asked to go on the Rathwood Easter Train and let you fine people know what we thought (* We were provided with free tickets for review purposes). It is egg-sactly the kind of thing we had planned for the midterm and so didn’t take me long to say yes, especially as it combines 3 of my favourite things; family fun days, chocolate and really really bad Easter puns. I was egg-static to be going, especially as I didn’t have to shell out for the tickets.   

So, we hatched a plan to go on the first Monday of the midterm and we got up that morning all egg-cited. I’m not yolking! We hopped in the car off we went, haring down the motorway. It’s only just over an hour from our home in Kilmeaden, County Waterford to Rathwood, on the Wicklow/Carlow border. We were meeting cousins there, they travelled from just outside Wexford town and it took them egg-sactly an hour to arrive.

In the Night Garden Baby range – Daddy and the Boo review

“Ruff Ruff Ruff!!”, goes Shoop (our little Jack Russell) ‘What the hell is going on?’, I think. I’ve just woken up on the couch and there’s someone at the window. The dog is going mental. Serves me right for having a quick… Continue Reading →

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