So here I am sitting on the couch for the 20th (plus*) night in a row waiting for my hyperactive little one to fall asleep.

 *it could be closer to treble figures at this stage

Now don’t get me wrong, I love her but at somewhere between 1am and 3am, when most other 23-month-olds are about 1/2 way through their nights sleep and she’s walking along the back of the couch like a tightrope artist or seeming to finally settle and then at the last minute trying to climb onto your head or demanding her 4th bottle of milk in a row while spinning round like a cross between the energiser bunnny and a sling top, then line between love and some other ‘less fond emotion’ are very blurred. (*all of the above examples have been witnessed in the last 30 mins)

I used to have to bring her off in the car to try knock her out, now I play the waiting game instead.

I might do better with less sleep than most people but I’d prefer my ‘night owl’ activities be of my own making and involve more PlayStation, boxsets, movies and craft beer rather than the Gruffalo and ‘baby nighttime wind down’ songs (and being used as ‘a human climbing frame’). So as I wait for her to literally drop with tiredness, I’ve decided to express my feelings through memes.



no need Oprah, we're already fully stocked here.   no need Oprah, we’re already fully stocked here. It'd be worth a try at this stage.    It’d be worth a try at this stage. and don’t switch to “I’m hungry” either.



People who give this advice should be made mind these unruly second kids.   People who give this advice should be made mind these unruly second kids.


I love you but....  I love you but….

2:00 am